Tuesday, June 8, 2010

A Milestone

Tonight I hit a MILESTONE.

It was unplanned, unexpected and completely fulfilling.

Hubby and I cuddled up to watch the first episode of Losing it With Jillian. I even watched it eating a cup of peanut butter crunch covered in guilt. I felt hopeless. I felt like I wasn’t getting anywhere. Almost 2 years and barely 53 lbs. to show for it. Was all of the effort I have been putting into this really worth it? What do I have to show for it?

At first I was really disgusted by the show. It made me hurt for the people I was watching. It made me feel self conscious and question if I was just like them. I felt like Jillian was yelling right at me and her words hit home.

I realized that I have to choose to become a different person. It’s up to me. I make the choice. But my choice isn’t going to affect only me, but my husband, and my future family.

It was right after that episode that I said, “Let’s go run a mile.” Hubby was all for it, even though he had a hard, laborious day at work and was physically exhausted.

We hopped on our bikes and rode down to the track in town, a quick 5 minute warm up.

I put on my iPod and we pushed off from the starting line.  I thought to myself, “Just get around this track once, just a 1/4 mile. You can do that.”

I got to 1/4 mile and 3 minutes had passed. “Well, I can run 5 minutes, that’s the longest I’ve always done. I can at least do that.”

5 minutes passed, “Well, I’ve almost run a 1/2 mile, I might as well finish it up.”

Once I had run a 1/2 mile, it just seemed like common sense that I could finish the whole thing. After all, I was half way there.

3/4 of a mile came and then I tried to push it a little harder. Hubby came back and ran that last lap with me. I pushed it as hard as I could to get to that finish line.

The first mile I have run in my entire life without walking one single step.

13:15

Those numbers mean the world to me. Tears literally streamed down my face.

I am the girl who could  barely fit into the XL gym shorts in middle school and high school. I am the girl who was made fun of for my athletic inability. I am the girl who was always picked last. I am the girl who could never even run 1/8 of a mile.

I am that girl. I WAS that girl. She is a part of me. But I am a new woman. I am capable. I am strong. I am determined. I can do whatever I set my mind to. I will not quit.

If I can do this, so can you.

8 comments:

  1. Congratulations! That is a wonderful accomplishment! You deserve to be proud of yourself! In this journey we are not just trying to lose weight but to get fitter too. And you are on the right path dear!

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  2. Woo Hoo!! That is amazing.

    You can do anything you want to :D

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  3. I almost got tears reading this! Congrats! YOU aren't that girl anymore! You CAN do this! Keep it up!

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  4. Beautiful. Choices....what a great choice. Great job!!!

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  5. I am so happy and proud of you! The sky is the limit girlie!

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  6. Blog surfing today and came upon your blog - and I have to say CONGRATULATIONS! [I usually would just lurk, but how inspiring for your readers]

    I love your attitude the whole time you were running "Well, I did that lap, what's another?" nicely done - and so sweet your husband ran with you too.

    Way to go!

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  7. Congratulations! That is so awesome...I hope to get there myself one day, and I know I will...its in us, you just need to find it and I am happy you found yours.

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  8. You are absolutely awesome, a mile is AMAZING and so are you!

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