Monday, July 1, 2013

More than my Weight

I just posted about how I didn’t have anything else to say about weight loss and wouldn’t you know, I follow that up with a post about weight loss.

So here’s what got me thinking. I had basically stopped blogging regularly because I knew I wasn’t a super star in the weight loss world and felt like nobody wanted to read what I had to say.

And then you all commented about how there was more to me than my weight and that you all wanted to know about me as a person too.

It hit me as I read your comments. I let my weight control my identity. I allow my worth to be the equivalent of my weight on the scale. The higher the number, the less value I have as a person. My happiness is largely controlled by how my clothes fit.

In my mind, I am only as good as what I currently weigh.

When I lost almost 90 lbs., I discovered that I had worth. This was new to me because it was the first time I had ever lost a significant amount of weight in my adult life. I thought I had figured it out. I was not my weight. I was an amazing person who could accomplish anything that I set my mind to.

In retrospect, having gained back almost 40 of those lbs., I realize that even then, my worth was the equivalent to the number on the scale. I valued myself because I weighed less. And today, that part of my mentality hasn’t changed a bit. I despise myself because I weigh more.

If I am not solely a reflection of the number on the scale, then who am I? As a first step to learn to truly love myself for who I am, beyond the scale, I’m going to tell you who I am.

I am a wife, a daughter, a sister, an aunt, and friend. I am a child of God. I am a an editor, a technical writer, a marketing writer, a blogger, and photographer. I am a cook, a gardener, an artist, and singer. I am a walker, a jogger, a biker, and swimmer.

I am so much more than my weight. One of these days, I’ll believe it.


  1. It's hard not to judge ourselves according to our weight. I have went around totally in the dumps and all depressed today.... because of my weight. Well, I haven't even weighed in like 2 weeks, so technically because of how I feel in being able to tell I've gained weight. Blah. Weight loss = happy Staci. Weight gain = depressed/angry/irritated Staci. I hate the cycle!!!! Singer, eh? Lead or harmony? We could do a duet. LOL Good to see a post from you. :)

  2. I went back to right where I started so have stopped blogging about my weight entirely, but you know what? I'm happier when I am not blogging about my weight. I do the odd post on WW online but I don't let it control my every day to day life. Weight loss is a lifelong battle and it IS very hard. I want to see more of the REAL you and not what the scales control x Becca


  3. Just know that a lot of people can relate to you. When you grow up being criticized about your weight (which happened to me) it may be sometimes difficult to detach oneself from the “weight conversation” but it can be done and just know that we truly appreciate your openness and honesty. Hugs!

  4. I love your last two sentences. Believe it Alissa, you ARE more than the number on the scale!!

  5. you are SO right! I did a similar post today :)



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